Bush speech, redux; Oh, and World O'Crap is my hero

I'll be gone for the next week or so, down in Myrtle Beach, where I'll try to soothe the psychic wounds done to me by relentless thinking about tax laws and Republicans and the like.

Before I go, though, I have to say that I'm feeling a little embarrassed by my previous post, in which I suggested that I might occasionally "like" our boy king.

I think my reaction to his speech was at least in part affected by the fact that my outrage receptors have just been totally worn out after a week of snarling hate from the right. I'm worn down, then the dumb bastard cries a little bit, and suddenly I'm sympathetic.

With a couple of days to think about it, I feel a little sick about being manipulated by his show of emotion. He can cry all he wants, but he sent those men and women to their deaths.

On top of that, he's spent the past week-- OK, the past three years -- standing on the rubble of the World Trade Center, using the deaths of thousands of my fellow New Yorkers to advance his career and his crazy-ass agenda.

So, actually, Dubya, I'm reminded that I don't like you very much at all. Never have.

Anyway, to start my vacation on a much lighter note, I offer up this take on Dubya's speech, from World O'Crap. Here's just a sampler:

During the past four years as your President, I have accomplished many great things. Most notably, 9/11.

We love our First Lady. It's the law.

My brothers and sister are my closest friends. I talk to them once every couple of months. However, I talk to Karen Hughes everyday. See, I pay her to be my friend, and to pretend that I have super powers, and to shut the hell up when I don't want to listen to her. That's why America is the greatest country on earth.

But I believe that the most solemn duty of the American president is to protect the American people. If America shows uncertainty and weakness in this decade, the world will drift toward tragedy. This will not happen on my watch. Again, I mean.

In a new term, we will lead an aggressive effort to enroll millions of poor children who are eligible but not signed up for the government's health insurance programs. Hey, we could have done it this term, but it's only medical care for kids, so who cares?

Three days after September 11th, I stood where Americans died, in the ruins of the Twin Towers. Where was I on Sept 11th, 12th, and 13th, you ask. None of your damned business!

Since that day, I wake up every morning thinking about how to better protect our country. And then I read the comic strips. Garfield is my favorite. I also like to glance at the sports section.

On and on it goes. Go read it. It will make you laugh, it will make you cry, it will make you forget about tax laws and Republicans.