George W. Bush, master campaigner

My God, Democrats must be quaking in their boots at the awesome majesty of George W. Bush's political skills.

Cower in fear, laughable mortals, as you witness King George unleash the full power of his strategelogical might!

TREMBLE at his unassailable position on the Iraq war:

David Sanger: So if you had to recalculate — what might you have done differently in this case?

THE PRESIDENT: David, what I am now doing is leading us forward. There will be ample time for people to dissect decision making, what went right or what went wrong.

And that "ample time" is right now, apparently!

THE PRESIDENT: What's important is, is that our strategy was flexible enough to adjust to conditions on the ground as we eventually found them. Remember, we thought there would be flows of refugees, we thought there would be starvation, we thought the oil fields would be destroyed. And none of that happened. And so, therefore, our commanders were given the flexibility to adjust, and that's what you're seeing.

Spin that, Democrats. What we're seeing now is not mass death, destruction, chaos and the gradual diminution of American power. No, what we're seeing is our commanders adjusting to the repercussions of their amazing success!

Second Term, here we come!

But silly David Sanger doesn't quite get the picture:

Sanger: So this — the mistake is specifically what?

THE PRESIDENT: Well, it's a — it's a miscalculation of the — what the conditions would be like after a swift victory, because we never dreamt it would be that swift. And so the fundamental question is, what are you doing about it? And what we're doing about it is dealing with it. We've got a flexible plan. In other words, a plan —

Sanger: Was it flexible fast enough? I mean ...

THE PRESIDENT: Well, David, that's what historians and that's what people like yourself could judge. The point is, it was flexible.

There you go, David: it was flexible. 'Nuff said!

WEEP with joyful reassurance at his calm leadership on North Korea:

"Showing none of the alarm about the North's growing arsenal that he once voiced regularly about Iraq, he opened his palms and shrugged when an interviewer noted that new intelligence reports indicate that the North may now have the fuel to produce six or eight nuclear weapons."

SWOON in awe at his stirring optimism about the war on terror:

"As he prepared to accept his party's nomination for a second term in office this week, President Bush said the war against terrorism must be fought but that it's not likely to ever end.

"'I don't think you can win it,' the president said, when asked if the war on terrorism can be won. 'But I think you can create conditions so that those who use terror as a tool are less acceptable in parts of the world.'"

Yes, George W. Bush: Creating conditions so that those who use terror as a tool are less acceptable in parts of the world.

I'm printing up the bumper stickers now!